Previously on social networking sites...

You can have this social networking nonsense. This week the big blue F did a number on my head twice. The first time it was with the most bizarre coincidence and piece of evidence that the world is far smaller than we think it is, ladies and germs. Check it: a very old punk rock pal who I knew casually in DC through our bands playing together and what not. Yes, he was a drummer, but that goes without saying right? Anyway, he was the sweetest of the bunch and a unique kid whose name stuck with me long after I left DC. Also, his band was crazy fun, smart, and yeah, even, after much effort, became part of the big D. Anyway, flash forward to reconnecting with a bunch of those same DC folk (though he was originally from Little Rock, and was currently in Austin) and truth be told, he didn't remember me at first, but when reminded was very nice and we occasionally exchanged comments on posts, etc. This week I woke up, checked my fb account and was shocked to see photos from his somewhat blitzkreig wedding - that is, he fell in love and they got married almost immediately. That wasn't the shocker. The shocker was a photo of the happy couple with a woman who looked oddly familiar....glancing down at the tag, it appeared this best friend of the bride had the same name as my ex-husband's replacement wife for me. Turns out, it was her. What, I ask you, in the name of all that is cool in Gallifrey, the hell? How is that possible? Of all the people in the world for him to marry off the cuff? Of all the people in the world for her to be friends with? Of all the people to be married to my ex-husband who appropriated my punk rock life story to impress the very woman in the photos? Oh, for crying in the night. Then, minding my own business (because really, it's the only business I should mind) I again peruse fb to see what's up...and there is a brief mention of happy birthday to a former coworker and pal musician from DC posted by a good pal. Turns out the person died 4 years ago, at his own hand. I think I knew he had died (or had suspected based on some mentions by others) but officially found out that one of my sweetest most honest crushes from that era had not so easily shuffled off this mortal coil. I immediately went to a photo I had of him, a lovely one (like many I took at the time, back when I had fire in my eyes and a darkroom in my basement) and scanned it and sent it to the friend who made the post - I asked how/what happened? How could this beautiful, talented, sweet-hearted guy be gone?
And I got the news. I have to say, neither of these things is singular, there have been other reasons to unplug from the sham that is thinking that fb is actually manifesting actual friendships (though I know of people who have created whole new lives by surfing to find their old flames, and it's worked out for them, so...you know, all right for you two) but I think I'm done. I think it was better when I left a place and time, and didn't revisit it until it was meant to happen. This social networking feels like a crutch...maybe I'm doing it wrong or something, but I feel like I'm ignoring real people, real experiences...I miss the days when phones were attached to walls and tv was something you used to drown out the housemates.