and then it all turns to shit, and quickly. i bought the whole long-distance i love you thing, until i found his personal ad. what a cliche. calling me all the names he is in fact living up to right now. he doesn't love me. doesn't care about me. and once again i am in a monetary hole, and alone. how is it that i keep doing this over, and over? dunno. better job with no real pay right now, but that looks sketchy. dunno how to pay for school, and well...it is all almost too much to even write about anymore. again.